Surrounded
by LuvableLittleMonster
Summary: When Jace was ten years old, his father died, and he was sent to the Institute in New York. This is a brief history of what happened after that. Told from Alec's POV. NOT JaceXAlec!


**Hello, bonjour, hola, aloha, and uh... I don't know any more. *hangs head in shame* I am teh failboat. But enough about me! This is a brief history of what happened when Jace came to the Institute after Valentine faked his death the _second_ time. It's in Alec's point of view, and while it may seem like it's about Alec and Jace (hate that pairing. I really do. (I feel kind of bad to admit that before I found out Alec was gay I favored AlecXClary *hangs head in shame again* I should be hung. That is a _horrible_ pairing. but if Alec was straight, that would be my favorite one. *nodnod*)), later on it gets to be more about Alec and his feelings about the whole Magnus or Jace thing.**

**On with the show!  
LuvableLittleMonster**

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_Remember when you were the hunted  
Remember how I swallowed you in  
Remember the rewards shimmering on the floor  
Off the plastic chandelier  
Remember when I saw you in orbit  
Remember when I pulled you back in  
Remember looking on blinking into the dawn  
Thinking how this will never end_

There was a time, I think, when I wasn't gay. Whenever I think about it, though, and try to figure out the details, I get all confused. I can clearly remember one thing, though. I didn't always like Jace.

I remember when he came to us. I think I was about eleven, and Isabelle was around nine, which would make Jace ten. I followed him everywhere. Not that he went anywhere. Mostly, I just stayed in his room while he laid in his bed, not speaking or making a sound of any sort. Finally, in a few weeks, he started getting up and moving around. Soon, his favorite place seemed to be on the roof of the Institute.

He would walk over to the edge, stand up on the short wall that surrounded it, and look down to the streets far below. I let him stay up there as long as he liked, but it was when he started to sway back and forth slowly that I would pull him back off the ledge and bring him back to his room. He still didn't speak, but that was fine. I knew he would talk when he was ready for it.

One day, we were out on the roof and I heard something. Jace was standing on the ledge and I was about a foot and a half behind him, ready to pull him back down if he started swaying.

"Alec?" A small voice asked. At first I thought Isabelle had come up to the roof to watch us again, but when I turned around she wasn't there. "Alec?" There it was again, except this time I knew it was behind me. I turned back to look at Jace and found that he was off the ledge and looking at me carefully. "Why do you let me stand up there?"

It took me a moment to actually register that he'd asked a question. "Uh, You just... you seem to like it, and it's not like you're being hurt."

"But what if I fell?"

"You won't. I won't let you." It was too quiet on the roof. There didn't seem to be any sound coming from _any_thing "C'mon, let's go back to your room." We walked in silence for a while, and it wasn't until we were right outside his room that he spoke again.

"What if I wanted to?" I stopped, my hand still outstretched to turn the doorknob. I dropped my arm and turned toward him.

"But why would you want to fall?" He just looked at the ground. He never answered me.

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**I _really_ don't like that whole first line or two. I can't even remember where I was going with that. This whole thing is a lot shorter than it is in my head... Also, how cute is a suicidal ten-year-old Jace?  
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**So it's been a while since I've updated _anything_. In my defense (and I really don't expect anyone to feel sorry for me) I've been grounded for quite a while. Plus, last Sunday I sliced my thumb open doing dishes. *smug* I got out of doing them for a week. Anyway, I have been writing despite my being grounded. I wrote this a few months ago, but since I haven't finished the rest of it I never posted it. I am going to be dong the whole song (Surrounded (or Spiraling) by the Silversun Pickups, in case you were wondering), but this is all that's done so far. I don't know when I'll post the next part (or if I ever will. I think this is a good ending, don't you?), since I really shouldn't even be on the computer now. I don't get very much time to type, really. Moving on, I am working on the next (and most likely last, unless I think of an idea for a sequel) installment of _Dear_, and I'm thinking of just posting what I have so far, since it's not quite finished, but it is enough to get it started. It's about halfway done, so if you've read the rest of them and think I should just post what I have and post the rest later, tell me. **

**Ciao, darlings!  
~LuvableLittleMonster~**


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